Feb 16 2007
In Memorium - Edward McIntyre
Given my easy access to such an open public forum, I thought I would be remiss to not at least make mention of this.
Eddie McIntyre, the best friend of a very good friend, just took his life the other night. The obituary was just posted today here in the Miami Herald.
In talking with my friend while trying to help her through it, I was telling her that I personally am having a hard time wrapping my head around the situation. First off, although I didn't know him all that well, to the extent I did, I knew that Eddie was just an all-around good guy who deserved better. Secondly, she and Eddie have been friends for many many years and I shudder to think of what it's doing to her.
However, the main issue I'm having trouble with is understanding how, despite the fact that Eddie was very successful, had an abundance of friends, and was very active in the community, his chronic depression finally got the best of him. Specifically, it's difficult for people like myself, who don't suffer from clinical depression, to understand what it must be like. And this, unfortunately, just highlights the issue. Like most everyone else, I have times when I feel down. But I just can't seem to grasp how death could be the only solution for someone who apparently has everything else going on for him or her.
My apologies, this should not be, nor did I intend to make this, about me.
I'm glad I got to meet Eddie, and I send out my deepest sympathies to my friend, as well as Eddie's other family and friends. He was a really good guy, and he will be missed.
Aaaah grasshopper. It is because chronic, clinical depression defies all laws of reasoning and rationale. There is a little demon, mocking us all, drawing us towards the darknes. Slowly but surely. Like a junkie to a drug.
What I think most people cannot understand is that it is not personal, this taking of one’s life. It is, at times, the only solution.
I am very sorry for your loss. I hope his family, his friends and you come through this without too much agony.
For as cheap as it sounds, he’s at peace now. You should find comfort in that.
Kram!
Ah, man. I hear what you’re saying, and please believe that I say this with the best possible intentions: sadly, sometimes it is as horribly simple as a problem with the genetic wiring. It’s baffling to think of or comprehend, and a struggle for the individual that we can never understand.
Anyway, best to you, yours and his especially.
That was a wonderful tribute. It is unfortunate that he is no longer with us in the natural. I am sure that his spirit will live on through the many people that he touched through his work in the community.
I lost one of my best friends when I was a sophomore in college, under similar circumstances: he was popular, smart, headed to med school, had everything going for him… except for the mental illness that propelled him to suicide. Over a decade later I can tell you that I still don’t fully “understand” why I lost my buddy, and there’s nothing wrong with you not understanding either. It is more a matter of acceptance. I accept that at the time he made that fateful decision, just like your friend Eddie, death was the only option he could see in the dark tunnel he found himself in. That tunnel was a product of his condition and it is something most of us do not experience because we don’t have the same condition. May Eddie RIP.