Mar 13 2009
Fuck Anger Management!
You never know what is enough, until you know what is more than enough.
~William Blake, Proverbs of Hell
Man, I’d forgotten just how delicious an emotion anger can be.
I’ve been working on managing my anger (and other emotions) through Buddhism, meditation, and yoga ever since I first got to Asia. I’ve been doing it for a variety of reasons — in Asia, it’s culturally unacceptable to get angry in public (i.e., everywhere), it’s generally healthier to focus your anger towards such positive outlets (i.e., yoga, surfing, etc.), and because I’m just generally trying to be a nicer, more mature person (i.e., I’m getting to the age where it’s just unbecoming to be angry).
But as I noted in a recent post, pushing those emotion too far away also has consequences. Like letting TOO many things slide without a fight. Like a failure to acknowledge when someone else has been mean or rude or reckless with you. Like diffusing the emotions so often that it becomes emasculating.
Right now, however, I’m over it. Now? I’m just mad. No, strike that — I’m fucking pissed off.
Man, it’s been a while since I’ve felt this way. And you know what? It feels good. Because it is rage justified. And anger fuels better decisions.
I don’t care if it renders my behavior immature, or surly, or what-the-fuck-ever other judgment call is thrown back at me. It’s unnatural to remain smooth, calm, and unaffected by the frustrations experienced in life. And if there’s no slack — either I’m too soft or I’m too surly — fuck it. it’s nice to be happily pissed off again, if only for an hour or two.
It reminds me of who I am, and that I’m still alive.
5 Responses to “Fuck Anger Management!”
I hate to get all Dark Side of the Force on you, but some times you need to embrace the anger. Or at least that’s what I tell myself when I’m all worked up in a fury. All the time.
Maybe you need to find out what is really the culprit of your anger. I tried to remind myself that I shouldn’t get angry when dealing with my family, but it didn’t work. I no longer speak to my entire family. Life is pretty wonderful right now. I had no idea how much they were really pissing me off until they were no longer around. We grew in different directions and as Dr. Phil would say, “It’s ok not to love your family, it’s ok”. (not a Dr. Phil fan either) I now have a much brighter outlook on life. My wrinkles are gone around my eyes (no more crying) and I look 10 years younger. In fact I’m glowing. I have more money, more free time, a smile on my face and I don’t have that nagging feeling at my back. Guilt free. As a concequence from all the happiness, I think I get more dates too. Life is beautiful.
i could have told you that but more often then not i am the one who brings those feelings out in others so i may indulge my self in anger and rage. the yoga and meditation lets you know your alive by full awareness, but rage and anger are our most primal male emotions (i said male) and they let you know your alive by knowing you wanna punch someone in the head.
lol
Dude, what’s going on? Two back to back posts clearly showing you are very pissed…but no clue of what went down. Who do we have to break? I help you.
The watchman has signaled “ALL CLEAR” y’all. The storm has passed, and I’m feeling much better.
The anger has long dissipated, lessons learned, and I’m heading back to Asia.
I’m not ready to return to the West yet … just way too much of a sensory overload.