Feb
27
2007
In making any major life-altering decisions, one is always told to weigh the pros and cons of the situation.
Personally, I don't particularly see the benefits of engaging in such a fruitless exercise. But in the interest of fairness to all the self-help gurus promoting this dribble (and to appease several of my Miamian friends questioning my decision to possibly leave the area), here are some of my "pros" and "cons" in connection with a potential departure from Miami:
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Pros:
Beautifully Mild Weather (winter)
Very High Standards of Living
Incredibly Beautiful Women
Decent Surfing (winter)
Beautiful Latina Women
International Latino Culture
Great Party & Club Scene
Great Fishing/Boating/Wakeboarding
Warm Winter Weather
Beautiful Brazilian Women
Beautiful Brazilian Steak Houses
"Flexible" Law Enforcement Policies
Hulk Hogan is my neighbor
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Cons:
Intolerably Hot Weather (summer)
Incredibly Expensive Cost of Living
Incredibly Expensive Cost of Women
Nonexistent Surfing (summer)
Abundantly Shallow, Vapid Women
Lack of Any Other Cultures
Devastating Hurricanes
Lack of Topography
"Divine Comedy-esque" Summer Weather
Remarkable "Mannequin-esque" Women
A Stunning Lack of Good Restaurants
"Third World" Socio-Political Conditions
Jennifer Lopez is my neighbor
Lack of Intelligent Discourse About Anything Other Than Fidel Castro And The Long-Standing U.S. Embargo On Cuba
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Wow, I stand corrected. That exercise was very helpful. Thanks guys!
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Please. This is the easiest decision you’ll ever have to make. Just factor these points into your pros & cons columns:
San Francisco — one of the coolest, classiest, all-around best cities in America, which draws some of the most enlightened people from around the world and encourages intelligent discourse and meaningful social responsibility.
Miami — a third-world hell-hole which draws rappers, South American drug lords, Paris Hilton and Elian Gonzalez, and encourages anti-Castro lunacy, 72′ spinning chrome rims and doing blow off the back of toilet seats.
The whole point of why I registered yesterday.
Yesterday while I was reading this my daughter was watch Lelo & Stitch and the Hawaii 5 O song was playing. That theme song makes your list flow much better. LOL
Be safe…