Archive for the 'World News' Category

May 04 2008

Business As Usual … Mixaphorically Speaking

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(Rote, Indonesia — August 2007)

If it hasn't been made abundantly clear by now, I absolutely LOVE Bangkok. Love. It.

My friends here, the food here, the music, the shopping, the … well, everything — it's just a great place. At times, it reminds me so much of NYC that it's ridiculous (except for the cost of living … which, although nominal, is still high by Thai standards).

So, for anyone who has the opportunity, I highly recommend both visiting and/or living here (at least for some time, if at all possible).

That being said, there is still no surfing to be done in Bangkok. Or the rest of Thailand, for that matter (and to those people who say there's 'surfing' in Phuket, I would respectfully disagree … STRONGLY. Really, saying that you can go surfing in Phuket is like saying you can drive a car with your feet — sure, you could do it, but it don't make it a good fucking idea).

So, despite everything, I just made plans for another month-long surf trip down to Indonesia in a couple of weeks.

This time I'm returning to Rote, Timur — the place in the above picture, where I spent a month last August. Although not perfect, it's the closest place to it that I've found so far — small (or at least only intermittent) crowds, consistent and great (if not 'world class') surf, no electricity, no running water, and cheap as anything else to be found in Indonesia. Best of all, it's located in a small, stable fishing village with local peoples still relatively unbesmirched by the lure of plentiful tourists and their 'easy-money.'

So, despite a long, fun (and ultimately debilitating) night out clubbing at "BED" and "The Supper Club" on Friday night, I'm still nowhere NEAR my fill of all that Bangkok has to offer. But give it a couple more weeks … I'm betting I'll be ready for the tranquility of another island out in the middle of nowhere … or at least, I hope so.

5 responses so far

Apr 02 2008

Living In the Middle of The Ocean With No Future and No Past

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(A picture taken of the break last year in front of the Karang Nyimbor Hotel — where I'm staying in Southern Sumatra)

I'm torn between my desire to detail for those interested in visiting the Krui area of Sumatra (where I currently am), and my desire to just talk about my own shit (like usual). So I'll compromise and do a little bit of both.

There are several breaks in the Krui area — comprised of an exposed beach and reef that has good, reliable surf all throughout the dry season of March through October. One of the best features of the area is that it's one of the only places in Indonesia that has some decent right-handed breaks (Indonesia is known as 'land of the lefts').

As noted previously, I am staying about an hour south of Krui town, in a small fishing village called Ujung Bocur. The entire area is an absolutely idyllic tropical setting.

When it's working properly, the wave here (a.k.a. Sumatra's longest left) is a quality long point reef. It's a long, walled up wave with three connecting sections that breaks on all tides and provides some amazing rides of up to 1/2 a kilometer long.

Unfortunately, I've had only a few truly decent days of surf in the past week — it was initially a bit inconsistent due to a cyclone that was sitting off the northwestern coast of Australia (Cyclone Pancho — and no, I'm not kidding about the name).

As noted previously, there are several other minor issues with the area — all of which have been EASILY outweighed by only one (1) awesome day in the surf. The biggest issue is that, although there are some amazing surf spots all up and down the coast, most are very far apart, requiring a lot of time on the road, and you need to get to them before the afternoon wind gets up.

The second biggest problem is also probably one of the best features of the area — it's isolation and difficulty to reach. I did it the 'expensive' way — traveling direct from Singapore to Jakarta (in West Java), then sleeping in the Jakarta Airport Hotel as part of the mandatory overnight stay (US$100 — an absolute FORTUNE in Indo Rupiah), then the morning flight from Jakarta to Bandar Lampung (in southern Sumatra), and then a privately hired 'bemo' (taxi) to drive the final 5-6 hours around the volcano's to Krui.

  • The total travel time to Krui from Singapore (including layovers, etc.), which is only about 250 miles away, is 2 days.
  • The nearest Bank/ATM machine — 2-2.5 hours away by taxi/motorbike (3-4 hours if by public bus).
  • English is hardly spoken or understood ANYWHERE in the area (except by the few ex-pat surfers living/running surf camps in the area).

Again, these inconveniences are becoming easily overlooked after only one day of getting treated like royalty by the guys over at Karang Nyimbor Hotel. The place is probably somewhat similar to how Bali was a few decades ago — no huge crowds of panting, overage Aussies, no huge shopping markets, no nothing, really.

And now the wind is dropping — the surf is picking up — the weather is gorgeous. Fucking 'ell, man. It's absolutely awesome. THIS is the shit I came out here for!! I'm going surfing for a bit, I'll see y'all in a few days (or so…).

P.S. AmTrust Direct Bank STILL sucks ass!! Fuck, I can't even get onto the AmTrust website anymore. Could someone back in the States try to get on and see if it's just cuz they're blocking overseas customers (i.e., ME) or if the entire Bank is gone. Thanks all!

3 responses so far

Mar 27 2008

Fortunately, I’m adhering to a pretty strict drug regimen to keep my mind, you know, uh … limber

Quickly, I'm still alive.

I'm in a small villiage outside the southern villiage of Krui, in Southern Sumatra, Indonesia. I flew from Bangkok to Singapore to Jakarta to Bandar Lumpung, and then a quick 5.5 hour jaunt in a 'taxi' around the sides of a couple volcanos.

But I'm here now. And there's some nice surf … sorta.

There's surf alright, but the afternoons have been dealing up some 'brisk' 20-30 knot winds — which kinda wrecks havok on the surf breaks.

Anyway, this is one of the few places in Indo that has some decent right hand breaks. However, due to the heavy winds ('angin kuat'), I'm thinking of heading back over to Western Java next week. We'll see how the weather unfolds.

I'm staying a great little place called 'Family Loseman' located in an idylic setting right on the beach about 30 minutes outside Krui — total cost for room and 3 square meals a day - apprx. US$12.50/nite. Nice!

I'll tell you guys, everything they show in those stupid Corona commercials — that's nothing compared to this type of confortable isolation. It's not too shabby.

I'm working on my Bahasa Indonesian language skills, and things are generally fantastic. I'll write more when and if I return to civilization. Hope everyone is still doing well, and I'll keep up when I can.

Peace.

No responses yet

Jan 23 2008

Tigers and Monkeys and Bats … Oh Shit!

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(map of Sri Lanka — for your reference and files)

I've thought long and hard about how to begin this particular post, given the fact that my sister may eventually read it, and she in turn will eventually tattle on me to my parents (just like when we were kids … man, some things never change). The easiest way is this:

I will never NEVER hesitate to ask for directions again. EVER!

As mentioned previously, I headed up here to Kandy to get my Indian Visa - boarding a train in Mirissa (Matara) in the far, far south, that I was told (repeat: TOLD) went through Colombo and then straight on to Kandy.

Yeah, not so much.

I probably should have first noticed something was wrong when the train hit a military checkpoint set up by the Sri Lankan Army to the north of the town of Vavuniya, Sri Lanka. It was only then that I learned — through a series of conversations in broken English, Singalese and Tamil — that I was not on the train to Kandy. Rather, I was on the train to Jaffna.

As in Jaffna, Sri Lanka's northern-most peninsula that is mostly under the control of the Tamil Tigers, the rebel insurgents fighting the Sri Lankan government. As a quick background for anyone not following the latest news on this (i.e., mostly all Americans, myself included until recently), Sri Lanka has been squeezed in the grip of a bloody civil war for the past 20 YEARS — the Sri Lankan Government on one side and the Tigers ('LTTE') on the other. There had been a toothless 'cease-fire agreement' in place for the past couple of years, but that too was formally dissolved just weeks ago after a string of violent clashes between the government forces and the LTTE.

Now, it appears the country is heading back to war. A civil war. A bloody, nasty, unnecessary, ridiculously over-extended civil war.

Fortunately for the surf-tourists, the violence has, for the most part, not extended into the island's southwest area — at least the far southwest, where I was surfing. In contrast, from all reports, the northern area is a cauldron of violence not suitable for tourists or locals alike.

So, through my own ignorance and stupidity, where did I wind up taking a train ride to? You got it — the absolute heart of the Tamil rebellion. Man oh man, sometimes I really do live up to the title of this blog.

Don't get too riled up, sis — I didn't stay there for long. In fact, my stay in the north can be counted in seconds, not even minutes. Shit, I didn't even actually make it into Jaffna proper. Instead, the absolute SECOND I realized where I was — when someone who read English pointed it out for me on the map, at which point I promptly flipped out — I literally jumped off at the next stop, ran across another set of tracks, and jumped on the nearest train heading back in the other directions. No, I'm not kidding. In fact, I may have been screaming like a little girl at the time, but I can't quite remember.

I didn't ask where that southbound train was heading. Frankly, I didn't care.

I had seen how some of the other (ever-increasingly Tamil) passengers were looking at me as I was trying to glean our location, and I had visions of the next days headline:

"In other news, an American tourist was taken hostage today in the Jaffna region. Officials are unsure why this tourist was even in that war-ravaged region, despite warnings …"

So yeah, I ran away like the little bitch I am. And yeah, I'm okay with that.

Any of you war correspondents out there who want to size up — okay, you win the big brass balls award. I'll give you that right now.

No kidding, being in a war zone while you're actually at war is fucked up enough (although I've been prepared to do it). But heading into a war zone just for the hell of it? Man, that's just nucking futs!

Luckily, the trains here in Sri Lanka run almost 24 hours a day, so I eventually found another train heading over to Kandy from the ridiculously obscure area I eventually found myself back down in the south. But what should have only been a 5-6 hour train ride instead wound up taking me about 12 hours.

I'm now in Kandy, but I have to wait a full week to get my visa due to the national holiday on Tuesday. So I've been walking around the lake, up the hills, and around the town. The city is beautiful, despite the massively overt military presence (everyone seems to be carrying an automatic rifle — I've an absolutely comical picture of a sign at an ATM stall with a circle and slash through it, prohibiting not cigarettes … but automatic rifles. I shit you not).

And instead of Tigers, Kandy seems to be infested with monkeys and bats (and the occasional elephant). And I got bit by some guys dog (he was kind enough to run inside and show me the vaccination documents, tho). Hey, the dogs, monkeys and the bats ain't carrying automatic weapons or munitions, so I'm cool with 'em.

They say that every adventure isn't an adventure while you're going through it. Yeah, maybe. But I'm guessing there are easier ways of having an adventure than by inadvertently wandering behind enemy lines.

Jiminy Crickets, can't we all just get along? I mean, really, I only came here to surf. To hell with this, I'm heading back down south until my visa comes through next week.

4 responses so far

Jan 16 2008

Bomb blast Kills 24 In Buttala, Sri Lanka

Well, THIS definitely isn't good — for anyone.

Despite the surf being what it is and my need to get an Indian Visa up in Kandy, I'm currently rethinking the plans I have to travel to that precise region next week. I'm okay here down south (for now), and I'll keep everyone in the loop.

All my best wishes to those hurt and killed in the violence, and to their dear families as well. Namaste.

2 responses so far

Nov 22 2007

Under the Table and Dreaming Oblivious

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Those of you who, to your great misfortune, have been reading this dribble for some time, may recall my discussion several months ago about the movie 'A Crude Awakening' and the phenomenon of 'Peak Oil'.

As noted in that post, the movie shows that the ever-diminishing supply of petroleum will have effects that, to the modern industrialized world, will make global warming itself seem like a walk in the park. According to experts, first will come oil-based political disputes between the West and those areas still producing the larger amounts of oil (cough, cough, … Iraq, Iran, Nicaragua, … cough, cough).

Next come inflated petrol prices, the collapse of international economic markets, and various other economic and political upheavals in (or caused by) those Western countries most reliant on foreign oil (cough, cough … fuck it, you know I mean the US).

Then finally, the utter collapse of Western civilization as we know it.

—————–

At this point, if you pay attention to foreign media reports, you can already see where this whole thing is heading. If not, well then … enjoy your turkey, you bloated fucker.

I say 'foreign media' because, as of the time of writing this (early Thanksgiving morning in the U.S.), there are absolutely no significant stories in the U.S. online press (i.e., CNN, MSNBC, Yahoo/AP News, etc.) discussing the issue that seems to dominate all the foreign press today — sky high oil prices and the effect on the global markets.

In contrast, both on TV and in print, BBC World, Yahoo International, and the International Herald Tribune, are at the time of writing, leading with the story of how:

'World equities were hammered Wednesday by soaring oil prices and fears over the global economy, with steep falls in Asia and Europe after volatile trade overnight on Wall Street, analysts said.'

Briefly, for those of you who aren't aware, oil went up to its highest price ever today — just shy of US $100 per barrel. The causes apparently pertain to US 'policies' in West Asia, production issues leading into the upcoming winter months, and, since barrels have always been priced by the US Dollar, which is doing poorly on the international markets, the barrels just ain't worth as much (as it were).

You would think that this, combined with the fact that the UN just published one of its most scathing reports about the state of global environmental issues, would be some cause for concern. Or at least a front page news slot.

I guess not.

Rather, at the time of this writing, in contrast to (what at least I consider to be) this very important global story, CNN America's lead story is … wait for it … wait for it …

'3 charged with causing Natalee Holloway's death.'

What. The. Fuck.

With those fucked up priorities, I'm guessing the new Shrek float in the Macy's Parade will be Wolf Blitzer's lead story on 'The Situation Room' tonight.

—————–

This post initially was going to be about how all that shit they talked about in 'A Crude Awakening' may perhaps, despite the recent oil discoveries in Brazil, all be starting to come to fruition.

Indeed, we are, as always, one bad bottle of Tequila away from all-out war in West Asia. We are slipping quickly into a global recession (or at least, a US recession). And, as noted, oil production is down and demand is up - leading to the highest petrol prices in history.

And yet, when I research to find some US media reports on all of this, all I could find there is a stunning investigative report on how workers are inflating the Scooby Doo balloon for Macy's 81st Annual Thanksgiving Day Parade.

For that reason, I didn't go off on the whole 'doom and gloom' scenario … again.

Instead, I went off on the state of the US media … again.

I know some of you may think all I do is sit here and think about ways to bitch about the media and the government back in the States. But I honestly don't see it that way. I don't go looking for this kinda Anti-American type of shit — it just come to me.

Regardless, you may have a point.

I really shouldn't complain about the state of 'journalism' in the US today. Really, the press is only giving the American public what it clamors for.

So, for Americans, that means CNN issuing a breaking report on how the Macy's Day Parade this year will be featuring the cast of "Legally Blonde." Whereas in the rest of the world, it means reporting on how they'll be feeding themselves in the next couple years.

Yep, maybe you guys are right — it's good to be the King.

One response so far

Jul 24 2007

Wreck Of The Day

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Sic transit gloria mundi. (All glory is fleeting.)
-Ancient Roman Proverb

In checking out the U.S. morning news this evening, I found this utterly unsurprising story to be at the top of the headlines. Hmm, so it appears that Lindsay Lohan has been arrested yet again for cocaine and drunk driving.

Wow. Ya' really got to give it to those U.S. network news guys for sniffing out the issues that are most important to the global community. Bravo, kind sirs. Bravo.

In contrast, their foreign counterparts have much to learn from their American brethren. Indeed, check out these obviously less important items that are in the major headlines in the international news this evening (morning in U.S.):

  • Taliban spokesman thinks S. Korean hostage crisis 'will be solved peacefully'
  • Suicide car bomber kills at least 22 in Hilla; roadside bomb kills 1; 24 bodies found
  • Spain nabs suspected double agent who sold names, secrets to Russia
  • Earthquake damage at nuclear plant raises questions in Japan
  • Bush to defend focus on Iraq in S.C. speech Tuesday

Uhh … yah. And you wonder why I'm returning next week back to where they don't have any electricity (or U.S. network news)? Just wake me up for the next O.J. trial.

No responses yet

Jul 19 2007

The Boys Are Back In Town

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(coming soon to a Hooters near you)

I just got finished booking the flight to my next extended destination after I return from Krabi, Thailand next week.

In an attempt to avoid the crowded "surfer-madness" fiasco of Western Indonesia — where several new airports have increased the number of surfers exponentially just in the past year alone — this time I'm heading to Kupang, in West Timor, Indonesia, which from what I hear is also great but still generally uncrowded (possibly due to the civil unrest in adjacent East Timor).

From there, my general plan is to stay on the remote islands of Sumba and Rote (or Roti), and possibly pay a visit to East Timor itself (depending on the state of affairs in the country, since last month many analysts stated that East Timor may be on the path to becoming a failed state).

As an aside, if I ever have the desire to get an office job ever again (I may have to get a job at some point in the next 4-5 years), I'm pretty damn sure I can make it as an "adventure traveler" travel agent.

I've only been at this a short time, and already I'm getting pretty good at figuring out what airlines fly into these remote airports, arranging ferry transport from the mainlands (the ferry between Kupang and Rote sank last year, killing dozens), and otherwise trying figure out how to get some place where there aren't a gazillion other people looking for the same thing you are.

With that said, after figuring out my trip route, I had to walk about 1-2 kilometers over to the local Singapore offices of an Indonesian airline called "Lion Airlines" (they don't allow you to book and pay online).

On my way back to the apartment (which is immediately adjacent to a major restaurant area that attracts many tourists), I came across an absurdly large number of people who were obviously, obviously American (the same thing applies to Americans as it does to bad poker players: "If you can't spot the sucker the first 5 minutes you're at the table, then you are the sucker."). And they all look exactly the same.

After a second, it hit me.

The U.S. Navy is in town.

I don't know what vessels, I don't know how many. But these guys stick out like a big, greasy, testosterone-laden sore thumb.

Please don't take that the wrong way, as my well wishes and prayers go out to all members of the U.S. military everywhere (especially right now, given their involuntary commitment in Bush's war of terrorism), but:

Not that I'm Mister "World Traveler" here, and I don't wish to disrespect any of my military cohorts — past, present, or future — but for the love of everything holy, if you don't want to attract attention to yourselves, you may way to go somewhere else besides the only goddamn McDonalds, Starbucks, Olive Garden, and Hooters in a 50 square kilometer radius.

Moreover, to those military guys who joined up in order to "see the world" (a respectable and obviously understandable position, as well), allow me to provide another recommendation, if I may:

You may also want to consider trying out some other type of food, entertainment, or experience that you can't get down the street from where you grew up back in the States.

Try some damn chicken fried rice or some duck porridge, for the love of god. Go hang out and have a bottle of wine and a smoke out at the local hookah house. Walk around the city and take in the sights down in Little India.

But please, do not, do not, do not head to "Go", collect your US$200, and make a beeline straight to the nearest Hooters for a burger, fries, and a Budweiser and pretend you're back in Bum-Fuck, Kansas.

Go ahead and try some of the other shit the world has to offer - trust me, you'll like it. And in the end, you'll thank me.

However, if you're still having trouble adapting, that's okay, I guess — why don't you go over to Plaza Singapura and watch the new "Transformers" movie — cuz that shit rocked!!

One response so far

Jun 01 2007

Bienviendos A Miami … Part II

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No, that's not Miami, but it's pretty damn close.

I arrived here in Singapore last night at about midnight or so, and then proceeded to go out to a club until 5:00 a.m. or so.

Man, there's nothing more that I like to do than to fly around the globe for 20 hours before heading out to a club. Damn, I feel just great today.

But here's the thing …

Singapore is, for the most part, just like Miami. The nightlife, the weather (steamy), the beautiful hi-rises on the water, and a ton, a ton of really hot women.

But, from what i can tell so far, Singapore (and, more importantly, it's women) doesn't have that overbearing sense of self-righteousness and pretentiousness that is Miami.

The people are fun, the streets are clean, it's really safe, it's not nearly as creepy as I thought it would be (given all the media hyped crazy-strict Sing "law enforcement" of all crimes, great and small), and get this … the crowds are more diversified than in Miami. Shocker, huh?

It's funny, I had visualized myself taking a cab from the Sing airport and having an epiphany moment staring at the new landscape — just like Bill Murry in Lost In Translation upon first arriving to Tokyo. Sure, I did to some extent; but I found myself watching "Mr. Bean" on the DVD in the taxi because it all seemed so familiar (and because Rowand Atkinson is just that funny too, of course).

I'm sure that will change once I start looking around, definitely. But for now, I'm so glad I'm doing this and I'm wondering why I ever considered otherwise.

P.S. And oh yeah, unlike American Airlines, my 8 hour flight from Tokyo to Singapore onboard Japan Airlines was freaking amazing!

Among other things, the food was better than that which I've eaten in most Miami restaurants, and all the AV equipment worked incredibly well (although, unfortunately, this led me to watch Ghost Rider - 1.5 hours of my life I'll never get back).

Hell, I probably could have gotten a hummer from one of the preternaturally beautiful stewardess if I'd asked.

Really, it was that good.

3 responses so far

May 08 2007

Preparing To Skedaddle — Part “Can I Finally Just Get The Hell Out of Here?”

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Yeah, I've really nothing of substance to discuss. More than anything, I just wanted to get the words "Gringo" and "Beaner" off of the top of my page.

Today's the closing day for the sale of my condo — fucking finally. I've been busy packing all my stuff for the past several days, so I haven't really thought about, or had time to, post anything substantiative during that time. Once we get this show on the road, that will change.

I can, however, say this: In the past (and quite probably my last) week here in Miami, I've done several things I never even thought to do during the 8 years I've been here. To wit:

  • I went SCUBA diving with my Coast Guard neighbor (who has requested that I write about him - I hope this counts) off of 2nd Street in the heart of South Beach to an underwater bar, which I never previously knew existed, called "The Jose Cuervo." Yes, only in Miami Beach could you find a 22-ton concrete 8 seat margarita bar sunk 150 meters offshore. I almost half-expected to find the requisite bitchy Miami Beach bartender/model/actress/hooker working the bar. Not so much.
  • I went SCUBA diving in my pool at 2 a.m. in a condition that could most euphemistically be called "altered." It was only after laying on the bottom of the pool for a good 40 minutes staring at the bubbles from my breathing apparatus that I began to question whether it was a good idea to be engaging in such a potentially dangerous activity. Ironically, it was also the same time I began to question why I had never considered engaging in this activity previously (at which point, I promptly forgot what I was thinking about and resumed "Bubblefest '07.")
  • There is an actual, true, life-size, surf swell that has come through South Florida this week. So I've had the opportunity to surf the choppy, polluted, relatively small waves of Miami Beach just one last time - which usually doesn't happen this late in the year except when there's a hurricane. Ahh, good times.
  • I gave away virtually all of my worldly possessions other than my books, my clothes, my surfboards, and my Jeep. These items include, without limitation, a 55″ HDTV, an 8 piece dining room set, a beautiful leather couch and lounge chair, about 300 CD's (I copied them to hard-drive), 2 surfboards, and a 3′ tall Cobra carved out of teak (yeah, SCUBA diving ain't the only thing I should avoid doing while "altered" at 2 a.m.).
  • And finally, I've come to the pleasantly disconcerting realization that I really don't own anything of substance apart from my aforementioned books, clothes, Jeep, and surfboards. It's kind of a nice feeling to simplify, however. I highly recommend it.

3 responses so far

Apr 23 2007

Let’s All Hate Toronto

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Aww, just when I finished ranting about how it sometimes feels like I'm the only hater on the block, I found this little tidbit:

TORONTO, Ontario (Reuters) — The dislike of Canada's biggest city, Toronto, in the rest of the country runs so deep that a filmmaker has made a documentary about it.

"People in Toronto are soulless, one-eyed corporate zombies," Joey Keithley, of the Vancouver punk band D.O.A., says in the film, "Let's All Hate Toronto."

The 73-minute film, which premieres at Toronto's Hot Docs documentary festival next week, follows a character called Mister Toronto, who embarks on a cross-Canada trip brandishing a sign that reads "Toronto Appreciation Day" and steels himself for the onslaught.

"There is something different (about hating Toronto). People are more passionate about it," filmmaker and co-director Albert Nerenberg said in an interview.

(Via CNN)

I'm not alone! I'm really not alone! Haters of the world, unite!!

P.S. What in the hell is a "one eyed corporate zombie"? And why are they any worse than two-eyed corporate zombies? I'm just asking - cuz that's what I do.

One response so far

Apr 10 2007

To Recycle Or Unrecycle - That Is The Question

Published by A Bowl Of Stupid under World News, Travel

Thanks to the ramblings of my friends, anyone foolish enough to visit this blog recently has been provided a glimpse of the surly underbelly of life in the Far East (or at least Manny's freakishly disturbing view of it).

In fact, I wouldn't be the least bit surprised to read, with glaring accuracy, that TK 's version of the Indo-Chinese experience includes White Tigers, Lords of Death, and guys in funny suits throwing plastic explosives while poison arrows fall from the sky.

However, I found something that will hopefully change your view of the Pan-Asian cultures, and especially, how they are trying to made their world a more beautiful place.

Through the use of various trash disposal methods, including recycling and … uhh, … un-recycling.

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Intriguing new garbage disposal method or incorrect English translation. Before you judge too quickly, take a close look at the symbol they use to describe "Unrecycling" and then tell me what the fuck they mean.

P.S. Yes, I'm still out of the country, incommunicado. This a delayed posting, because I just trust my friends to maintain the journalistic integrity of this blog that much.

(Via Boing Boing)

3 responses so far

Mar 31 2007

Shall We Play A Game?

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The whole "sport hooligan" thing escapes me.

To be honest, the whole thing with obsessively rooting for professional sports, in general, escapes me.

As I've mentioned before, in my opinion, except for pure and abject boredom, there is absolutely no valid reason to root for a professional sports team.

The players on those teams don't know you, they don't like you, and most of them would just as likely have you killed to make a set of curtains out of your skin for their summer home in the Bahamas rather than spend a minute of time with you.

It is a ridiculous endeavor.

And that's what makes the whole idea of "sports hooliganism" all the more absurd (but ultimately, also all the more fascinating from an anthropological standpoint).

Not only do these mouth-breathers become so obsessed with the goings on of players on their favorite teams, they actually get so worked up that they are willing to kill, and be killed, all in the name of a sports team — typically consisting of a bunch of oversized megalomaniacal hop-heads, looking for nothing more than to make enough money to buy another luxury car to wreck, or to pay off the massive gambling debts incurred by their entourage.

However, out of Greece this week comes word of sports hooliganism I can almost understand.

Yes, they are rabid sports-fans, irrationally willing to defend the honour of their team to the death.

Yes, they got completely out of hand at a sporting event involving their favorite team.

Yes, they caused mayhem, destruction and death during an awe-inspiring brawl with their rivals.

But this time, at least it wasn't involving something as silly as soccer or American football.

This time, it was volleyball.

Womens volleyball.

Brawl Halts Team Sports In Greece
Greek authorities have canceled all team sports matches for two weeks after a mass brawl between rival women's volleyball fans left one man dead.

The 25-year-old man who died had head injuries and stab wounds, doctors said. Several other people were injured in the brawl in the Peania area outside Athens.

"They were jumping on our car for five minutes, they were asking for our mobile phones and stabbed our driver," one witness said.

"We had warned that this game was dangerous," the head of Greece's volleyball federation, Thanassis Beligratis, was quoted by the AFP news agency as saying.

What. The. Fuck?

All kidding aside, these are the peoples who birthed a nation that has lasted for over 3,000 years and is generally considered to be the seminal culture that provided the foundation for all of Western Civilization.

And now they're stabbing people at a womens volleyball tournament. For cell-phones.

Words escape me.

(Via With Leather)

8 responses so far

Mar 29 2007

How To Build A Jewish Meth Lab

Published by A Bowl Of Stupid under World News, WTF

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Out of New York (where else) this week comes this story:

NY Bus Converted Into Oven for Matzos

It wasn't your typical fire. When police responded to a report that something smelled of smoke in the middle of the night, they found an old school bus that had been converted into a supersized oven for Passover matzos - complete with a smokestack, exhaust fans and working fire.

Police Sgt. Lou Scorziello said police traced the smoke to the bus at about 3 a.m. Friday. He said the back door of the bus, formerly the emergency exit, was the oven door. "All the seats had been removed and the whole inside was an oven," he said.

The derelict red-and-white bus, connected by a plywood passageway to a single-family house, was out of sight of casual passers-by in a Hasidic Jewish neighborhood and had apparently escaped the notice of authorities.

Money quote: "A building inspector said that while the bakery bus wasn't nearly up to code, it was 'very creative.'"

Well, we're nothing if not creative. Just ask Mel Gibson.

(Story via Kang, image via JibJab)

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