A Bowl of Stupid

One of the not entirely displeasing aspects of returning to where I grew up is seeing friends and relatives I haven’t seen in years, or even decades. Under normal circumstances, such visits would probably consist of nothing more than a discussion of who married whom, where whom is working, and other such general blather. However, given where I have been traveling and living for the past few years, such blather usually turns to questions of where I’ve been, where my favorite place is, what it’s like, how did I make the decision to leave my career and the States, and the like.

At times, I wish I could just gather up everyone I know in one room and take their questions all at once, so I wouldn’t have to answer the same questions over and over. At other times, I find myself enjoying the attention far too much, and falling into a self-righteous ex-pat characterture — regaling my audience with grand tales of adventure and daring and just how great things are in Asia.

Almost necessarily included in my description is just how much better things are outside the United States in terms of quality of life, inexpensive cost of living, cheap and plentiful health care, and lacking corporate overlords.

To be sure, most of the time, I’m just telling people what I want them to hear, and probably what we both wish is true. At times, it’s extremely easy to get caught up in one owns bullshit. Plus, I’m still a petty and petulant child in many respects, in that I want to prove how much better things are for me, and how much it sucks for everyone else too “weak” to have done what I did.

Those underlying issues notwithstanding, there are times when I’m reminded of just how true my comments regarding the state of affairs here in America really are. And just how bad things really have become, although most people here either can not see it, refuse to acknowledge it, or simply ignore it.

Chez just wrote a post, “Swine At The Trough”, as did Matt Tabibbi, “Goldman One-Ups Gordon Gekko, Says Jesus Embraced Greed” discussing just these issues — the absolute corporate ownership of the entire U.S. economy, its health care system (and associated benefits), and its absolute dismissal of the welfare of America’s general populous.

This is not to say that such things don’t take place in other countries. To be sure, a characteristic of the powerful has always been to hold down those without power, since the beginning of time. But this isn’t the issue.

The real issue, which is absolutely bewildering to me, is how the American public, cattle-like, have been brainwashed and stupefied to such a point that they don’t even realize how poorly they’re being treated. While at the same time, STILL giving their money and power willingly to the very people who have bewildered them into their current predicament. As Chez states, the mass of the American public is expendable. They just don’t realize it.

Once again, I haven’t lived abroad long enough to say this with absolute conviction, but I cannot see this happening in any other developed country in the world. They value their liberty far too much.

Perhaps it’s because Americans have been telling themselves that they are the best country in the world for far too long, that they can’t even begin to fathom just how far they have fallen. Perhaps I’m just a self-righteous asshole, determined to prove my way of thinking is the best. Who’s to say.

All I know is that, while the changing leaves and the brisk weather here in the Northeast are truly beautiful change of pace, I’m looking forward to returning to Asia. True, bribery and corruption may be a way of life over there as well, but at least the people there see those things for what they are, instead of desperately clinging to a perceived reality that no longer exists.

Salon published an article yesterday about President Obama’s ongoing attempts to redefine the healthcare industry back in the States. Apparently sensing a potential loss in their staggering profit margins, the healthcare providers and insurance companies back in the States ain’t gonna go quietly:

Obama may have gotten big healthcare industry players to agree to talk about reforms, but now that things are actually moving, they’re not playing along as nicely as the White House hoped they would. “Remember how [healthcare interest groups] all wanted a seat at the table?” one consultant working on the issue said. “Well, now they’re all throwing their food.”

As aptly noted in the article, the U.S. spends more money on healthcare than any nation in the world without much evidence that the quality of the care is any better.

Having lived outside the States for several years now without the ‘benefit’ of American health insurance, I’m starting to get a better grasp on just HOW true this is. And just HOW ridiculously overpriced, ineffective, and at times, simply bizarre, the healthcare industry is back in the States.

I’m had the need to ‘sample’ the medical industries in several Asian countries now, including those in purported ‘third-world’ countries — Indonesia, Philippines, Thailand, Sri Lanka, and India.

And while the range of medical procedures I’ve needed while traveling has ranged from a full-fledged operative procedure to simple medical checkups, none of those countries — NONE OF THEM — were so bound up in red tape and exaggerated costs as they are back in the States.

Indeed, even without the luxury of medical insurance for more extensive procedures and treatment (which I pray I never need), the costs for every treatment and drug I’ve needed so far cost pennies on the dollar for what the same thing would have cost back in the States.

Only after you’ve escaped the prison of the American healthcare system does it become crystal clear just how horribly that industry is raping the American public. Through years of unfettered access to Congressional representatives and Presidents, the American healthcare industry has entrenched itself in the American political and financial world so well as to possess the most coveted position of power outside the oil and banking industries.

It’s not a question of partisan politics. It’s a question of power and money. And as we will no doubt witness over the coming months and years, now that these rapists have become so entrenched, they won’t go without a fight. And they won’t go quietly.

Which is a shame, because I was thinking of returning to the States at some point.

For the uninitiated, Thailand has been engulfed by political turmoil in the form of “colored shirt” protests which have been taking place, on and off, for the better part of three (3) years.

The protests took an ugly turn this week when Thai military troops cracked down on rioting protesters from the anti-government “red shirt” group. Now, in the latest news, the leader of the rival ‘yellow shirt’ faction was gunned down yesterday:

BANGKOK (AP) — The founder of Thailand’s “yellow shirt” protest movement that shut down Bangkok airports last year was shot and wounded in an assassination attempt Friday, just days after troops cracked down on rioting protesters from the rival, anti-government “red shirt” group. Sondhi Limthongkul was in stable condition after surgery that removed a bullet from his skull.

Thai authorities have just released the following photo of a suspect in the shooting.

Despite the mask, police have tentatively identified the gunman as one John “Ham” Burglar. Mr. Burglar has a long criminal history — mostly limited to petty theft of various fast food items — and is presumed to be armed and dangerous.

We will keep you apprised of the situation as events unfold.

P.S. This is the maid speaking.

For anyone with a bit of a fond nostalgic streak, or for those who would pity (the admittedly pitiable) departing President G.W. Bush, or even if, like me, you simply want to forget the past and move on — I would ask that you do one thing first:

Read the piece that just came out in the February 2009 edition of Vanity Fair — distilled from scores of interviews — which offers fresh insight into the roles of George W. Bush, Dick Cheney, and other key players, entitled: An Oral History of the Bush White House.

It’s not so much a news article as it is a cautionary tale to those who may try to forget or otherwise whitewash the raping of the United States, Iraq, the environment, the global financial markets, and the world itself, in its entirety, by the Bush Administration over the past 8 years.

The threat of 9/11 ignored. The threat of Iraq hyped and manipulated. Guantánamo and Abu Ghraib. Hurricane Katrina. The shredding of civil liberties. The rise of Iran. Global warming. Economic disaster.

I’ve no pithy remarks. No smartass commentary. No words of pseudo-wisdom to impart. I just hope as many people as possible read and remember this, and other relatively undiluted accounts of what REALLY took place over the past 8 years — before the Neocon spin masters get to it and turn George W. Bush into another Ronald Reagan.

I was just thinking it may be about time for me to go back to the States for a visit.

Yeah, not so much.

(Me – jalan-jalanning in Nembralla)

Continuing with my lazy-ass attempt to reply to the few people who still actually read — or, more likely, inadvertently stumble upon — this blog, I offer the following emails, and my responses:

‘Drew’ wrote, asking:

“What doe the tattoo on your back mean? Where did you get it from??”

The tattoo is written in Tibetian Sanscrit, and it means “Oh Mani Padme Hum’ — you can go check out this website for a more complete description/meaning (cuz frankly, as has been previously established, I’m just too lazy). I got the tattoo in a shop in South Miami Beach (I think on the corner of Washington and 7th street).

Rhonda from the blog ‘Smashed Ham Sandwiches’ (whatever the hell that means) wrote, in part:

Funny thing, I have a “Bowl of Stupid” on my page. Not nearly as interesting as yours. I ran across the saying on a t-shirt somewhere a few years back and it has stuck with me as one of my favorites ever since. …I have to admit I can admire a man that is so adventurous, such as yourself.

Actually, I just wrote the good part, she kinda tore me a new asshole — something about my plagerizing from T.V. shows or something… Nah, I’m kidding, Rhonda was quite nice — go check out her blog when you get the chance. And thanks Phonda, I’m sure you’ll make it out of Michigan some day. If you choose to head out this way and have any questions, feel free to ask me.

And finally (for now), I got this email several weeks ago from Kevin in Australia (with my answers to his ‘several’ questions in bold):

How’s things? I found your blog when looking for information about krui. Some good reading there. Very jealous of your travels. I’ve thrown in the job a couple of times myself but only made it a year a time… but then the need for stabilty kicks in and I find myself back in normal life. Anyway, I’m off to krui on Friday. Have got my flight booked to Jakarta but that’s about all. Would appreciate your help with some questions if you have the time.

Did you prebook your flight to bandar lampung? No, I bought a ticket from the Merpati office in the Jakarta airport. It’s about the same price as pre-booking, and you don’t have to worry about missing connecting flight, etc. which airline did you go with? Merpati Airlines — unless Adam Air is back up and running, they’re the only gig in town. Any recommendation for an airport hotel for the Jakarta stopover? Yeah, the airport hotel — granted, it’s US$100/night, but after board storage, taxi rides, the 45-60 minutes in and back to town, the cost of hotels in town themselves, and other general shit, it’s really worth the money not to deal with the hastle. You walk 30 meters from one gate to the hotel, then another 40 meters to the Merpati counter.

How much cash would you recommend changing for a week in Krui? Actually, don’t recommend changing ANY cash. I would reccomend getting around 3 million rupiah from an ATM in Bandar Lampung (not including cost of transport to/back from Krui itself). figure I will head to a main town once a week to stock up on supplies and cash. Do it right afte rflight, since Bandar Lampung is the only town with a working ATM, western-style markets, etc. for 4-5 hour in any direction from Krui — so there you go.

What were your favourite breaks? Karang Nymbor ad Drew’s Right. I’m a bit worried about hitting the reef… is it generally deep enough to avoid injury if one gumbies the takeoff? Dude, I can’t answer that — if you’re surfing a reef break, you ALWAYS need to watch out. It’s not Desert Point, G-Land, or Pipe … but it’s a big clumps of living rock .. and hitting that pretty much always hurts (from what I’ve heard – I obviously am way to skilled to ever have gotten scraped up on a reef … ahem).

Kev, I’m sorry about the late response, I was in Rote with no internet for a month, and then when I got back home to Bangkok, I had to deal with some personal stuff (including wrestling my new surfboard back from the airlines), then I had a friend visiting from out of town, and finally, I had some prior appointments with a ‘relaxation therepist’ that I needed to attend to.

I’m guessing you’re already IN Krui area by now, so my answers my not be of any help. Sorry. But if you are there, and you happen to run in to some Scottish guy named Malcolm (he’s not actually Scottish, I just like messing with him), tell him I said ‘hey.’ Hope you’re getting some tasty waves. Cheers, mate.

There’s an interesting subtext — a conundrum — underlying this whole ‘blogging’ business.

For me, blogging began as an attempt to capitalize on my interest in the Internet (read: ‘computer geek’) — through the use of online advertising and retail. That idea went the way of the dodo when I made the decision to abandon the capitalistic American existence for a few years, in favor of a more simplistic life in the tropics of Southeast Asia.

At that point, blogging essentially morphed into nothing more than an easy way to memorialize my trip — physically and emotionally — and maybe make available some information about the places I’m visiting, mainly for myself, my friends and family, and anyone else with an Internet connection and a shit-load of free time on their hands.

Unknowingly (and unintentionally), this blog has also become useful in another way. When meeting people abroad, rather than handling out my phone number, email address, or other typical contact information, it’s infinitely easier to write or tell people to look up my website.

In my case, I’m not sure if they feel it’s an accurate description of me (the most likely scenario) or what, but the name of this blog tends to stick in peoples heads like a dull butter knife.

This is obviously a good thing. It’s easily allowed me to maintain contact with people I’ve met from all around the globe (most of them Swedish, for some god-forsaken reason). However, it also allows a greater, albeit not complete, view of my persona to people who may not otherwise get an unfettered glimpse of my full persona until later on into a friendship.

It is for that reason more than any other that I’ve changed how I write this blog.

Before I revealed my true identity (yes, I am a fuckin’ superhero – so shaddap) and started using this site as my own ‘Universal Business Card’ (“Call me!”), I tended to write bitter and scathing posts about politics, pop culture, celebrities, and a number of other divisive issues.

But I’ve since tried to tone down the content of this blog, so as not to offend any of the people I’ve met, or may meet, either with different views than mine or otherwise infected by the ‘politically correctness’ dictating the terms of conversations with people from the States and Europe.

Indeed, I’ve already had one acquaintance ask me, upon reading this site, why I hated India (and Indians) so much. After pointing out the dirty hippy’s and the innumerable burning trash heaps, as well as the debilitating viral infection I picked up there, I found myself apologizing (and feeling guilty for appearing as yet another Eurocentric racist). The same goes for many other issues, as well — even music.

In trying to tone down my vacuously sardonic sense of humour (admittedly, a humour that quickly wears thin and most persons with an IQ greater than 70 don’t understand to begin with), I’ve wound up unintentionally offending, and being overly-apologetic towards, more people than I otherwise would, because I’ve unknowingly disregarded their political sensitivities — both online and in the real world.

Who knows, maybe I’ve just been hanging out with too many Ozzies. Whatever.

While talking the other night with a friend (coincidentally, yet another Swede — I swear, they’re everywhere), we got to the whole topic of maintaining a blog. Somewhere during the course of the conversation, I remembered how the word ‘blog’ is the shortened version of the term ‘web log’ — as in a personal log … about your personal ideas, experiences, and relations.

In that regard, unless they’re selling something (ahem), if someone feels comfortable enough to post all their personal shit online anyway, what’s the point in censoring material to possibly placate the sensibilities of people who won’t understand the verse, or the underlying motivations. Admittedly, we do not live in a vacuum, and it’s simply good manners not to knowingly offend people — ‘do unto others’ and all that.

I agree with that sentiment entirely, and I sincerely try to live my life in that manner. But there are limits — especially in the context of writing your personal thoughts vis a vis a semi-private forum on the Internet.

With that said, I will say this one more time for anyone paying attention — I’ve got some fucked up personal views, I live a different kind of life than most, and I have some brash and (often times unfunny) humour. I know I’m not a racist, a misogynist, or an evil vapid soul (most nobody is, really). But I will apologize up front if anything I say may come across as offensive or insensitive.

I’m writing this shit for me as much as for you. So I will write how, when, and about, whatever-the-fuck I want. Just as I really don’t know you, you really can’t know me simply by reading the stupid, random shit I may throw up on some website from time to time.

I know I’ve raised this issue before in the past, whenever I lose track of why I’m even writing this shit. But once again, it’s my fucking website, and I thought it was about time for another reminder.

P.S. This is the maid speaking.

I finally made it!! After weeks of abusive viral infections and neo-hippie hombres, I’m finally out of India!

And probably not a moment too soon. I swear, I thought that place was trying to kill me — dengue fever, food poisoning, the constant smoke from all the burning garbage (and people). I really do feel about 1000% better now that I’m back in Sri Lanka.

Not that THAT process itself wasn’t a bit of a ball-buster. First, I had to spend about 4-5 hours on a train from Cochin to Thiruvananthapuram (affectionately called ‘Trivandrum’), seemingly stopping at every backwater hole-in-the-wall en route. I tried to eat and drink as little as possible during that time, which made me kinda weak, too. That may seem a bit much, but my stomach was still ‘bothering me’ [ahem], and if you see the hole in the bottom of the train they euphemistically call a ‘toilet’, you’ll understand my aversion.

I couldn’t sleep in a hotel in town, because thanks to the local Kerala Communist leadership, the next day — the actual day of my flight — the locals were staging a ‘fuel strike’ protesting the fuel cost hike, so no taxis, tuk-tuks, or anything motorized would be able to take me to the airport. When I asked someone about catching a random taxi working outside the strike, I was told I didn’t want to do that just in case it got stopped by an angry mob. Nice.

So instead, I went to the airport the early morning beforehand and I was able to get a nice 1-2 hour nap in the front lobby of the Trivandrum airport. Then, when it was finally time to check it, I had to wait another 8 hours in the airport while my flight was delayed. Shit, at that point, I honestly felt like the country was trying to keep me there – just to finish off the job.

The good news is that we eventually made it onto the 45 minute flight to Colombo, Sri Lanka. The bad news is that we arrived at 1:30 a.m. I somehow finagled my way into getting a free ride from the airport to Colombo (about 1 hour away), at which time I slept on the front steps of the Colombo train station for another couple hours until the station opened at 5:30 a.m.

Yes, I know this is the same train station that was bombed by Tamil Tiger separatists — killing dozens — just weeks ago. Yes, I know it probably wasn’t the smartest of ideas sleeping on the front steps of a public train station in downtown Colombo. But fuck it, I made it out of India alive — at that point, I felt absolutely invincible. Exhausted, but invincible.

I caught the 6:30 a.m. train down to Mirissa, where I am again — at Dinu’s Resort. I’m still a bit too ‘blech’ to eat anything, but it’s nice to be back in a place where the only things actively trying to kill you are the terrorists.

I got a couple surfs in yesterday before crashing for about 13 hours. I hope to have at least one more before I have to begin the 5 hour trek back up to the Colombo/Negombo airport for my 5:00 a.m. flight to Bangkok tomorrow morning.

I’m already really happy to be back in Sri Lanka. But I REALLY can’t wait to get back to Thailand. Sawadee kap, bitches!

Motherfucker.

I had a ‘doctor’ dig out a vast majority of the heel of my right foor, and he STILL didn’t get the last two 2.0-2.5 centimenter long sea urchin spikes residing in my foot for the better part of a week now. It was only after hitting the surf and then treating the wounds with a lime that Paul was able to extract them.

The infection is pretty well gone, as are all the spikes (I think/hope). Thanks for the well wishes, all.

And YES, I was bloody well wearing booties! They mean nothing to sea urchins. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got some surfing to do…

‘The more you know who you are, and what you want, the less you let things upset you.’
-Bob Harris

I know who I am, … And I know what I want, …

And it was called yellow.

I’m back in the States, and although I’m keeping good company (well, mostly, that is*), I am having a particularly tough time reconciling my travels over the past several months with what’s going on around me here in my ‘home country.’

There are a variety of issues flying around my head right now, many of which I staunchly refuse to discuss on a public forum such as this. However, there are some peripheral matters I do think necessary to address — if only to raise with the 4-5 people still reading this blog, my ongoing exercise in rhetorical masturbation.

The first issue I am really having problems with is the overwhelming sense of arrogance, entitlement, and just plain fucking gluttony that absolutely RULES the American psyche. Indeed, this view permeates every single aspect of the American culture – most of which I personally never saw before I left.

I have been made aware that my complaints and disillusionment with that culture may also be the simple byproduct of my own unjustified arrogance over everyone else here in the States grumbling about their everyday lives, yet who still resign themselves to such simple ’9 to 5′ existences.

Shit, if I weren’t better than them, then everyone I’ve met would themselves be doing what I’m doing instead of simply congratulating me for doing it myself … right? (That was a rhetorical question, please no need for comments).

Regardless of the cause (or the effect, for that matter), the results are the same — my seemingly endless supply of disgust at how far Americans have seemingly let themselves slip into the comfortable glove of self-entitlement and gluttony, no matter in what shape or form I find that view being presented:

• Whether it be the flippant willingness to pay more for a bottle of distilled tap water as does a family of 4 to live on for weeks in various third-world countries (most of which I obviously haven’t even scratched the surface) — this, despite the fact that potable water sources are available at their fingertips, quite literally.
• Whether it be in the form of arguing, fighting, or losing patience with minor issues or items that, in said third world countries, would be considered luxuries of unfathomable depths (the idea of ‘road rage’ or other matters relating to waiting in cue, to me now seems absolutely idiotic).
• Whether it be in the form of suburbanites, businesspersons, housewives or students spending (again) thousands of dollars just to learn how to relax more and work less, and live their lives better — the same way as many I’ve met in Indonesia, Thailand, and elsewhere do just as a matter of course, although they get ridiculed by many of those same Westerners for being seemingly slow and unproductive.
• Whether it be in the form of an entire (Western) civilization trying to lose weight, eat better, exercise more, and simply be healthier — all the while ignoring the underlying problems that have led to the problem. Indeed, I find it particularly ironic seeing people working themselves into a frenzy about work, or school, or whatever, and then thinking a 45 minute yoga class will relax them. (Shit, I find it even more comical to see people sitting in an office for 8-10 hours/day, and then driving to a gym 2 blocks away that they’ve paid US$50.00/month to attend, just so they can go ride the stationary bike or treadmill).
• Whether it be pseudo-environmentalists — regardless of how good their intentions may be — trying to recycle bottles and paper, to reduce water usage, and to refrain from disposing of litter on the street, all the while unthinkingly contributing more to the global environmental issues than they could ever possibly rectify without seriously altering their entire lives (but that would mean they would have to be cold, or hot, or dirty, or with bugs, or … something).

  Shit, I sometimes think that the bigger SUV they’ve got, the more angry they get about seeing someone throw a biodegradable paper cup to the side of the road rather than in a litter bin. I wonder just how enraged some of those people would get at seeing the Indonesian (and Thais, and Cambodians, and so on and so on …) simply burning their refuse on the side of the road, since those Americans conveniently forgot those people produce billions of tons LESS rubbish than they do.

Again, I am not unaware that much of my disgust in regard stems from my own pretension. But it’s still there, and it doesn’t really seem to be getting better. In fact, the longer I’m here (again, despite how beautiful my immediate company), it seems to be getting worse, and my desire to get back to Asia is growing stronger (indeed, it’s been pointed out to me that I am saying ‘hi’ to all the Asians we pass on the street, but not the Caucasians — yes, apparently I’m a racist).

The only good news in all of this is the fact that, for the first time in a long while, I’ve got something helping me to temper my disgust. Hopefully, that temperament will continue, and round off some of the rough edges that have taken shape over the past few years.

–

*C’mon TK, did you really think that just cuz we had nice time over a few beers that I’d stop trying to piss you off?

All of you goddamn parasites — just keep yer damn hands off!!! (Cough, cough, gollum, gollum … Gollum, gollum, cough).

We will bring the world of normals to its knees! We will build an empire so brilliant, so glorious, we will be the envy of the whole planet!

He has returned! The Anti-Christ has returned! (via Best Week Ever)

After resting and taking a few laps in the pool on Monday, I woke up today by visiting some of my regular online sources for news and entertainment — at which time, I was treated to even more good news.

First and foremost, I saw that finally, FINALLY, saner heads are prevailing down at Gitmo, where on Monday, military judges dismissed charges Monday against 2 Guantanamo detainees. In particular, the courts ruled that, in direct contradiction to the ever illogical position of the Bush Administration, the detainees are “not subject to this commission” under legislation passed by Congress and signed by Bush last year. Thank fucking god. Maybe this signals the first of many steps for the U.S. government to regain whats left of its dignity.

Second, I saw that there is indeed still hope that the upcoming Transformers live action movie may indeed be worth seeing (shit, I knew there was a reason I put them at the top of my MySpace friends list). If the rest of the movie has effects like this stuff, I may even be able to cleanse my mind of the crappy-CGI cryfest that was Spiderman 3.

And finally, there seems to be hope — finally — that we can all live longer, healthier lives with this great new “skin” tightening product (if the advert itself doesn’t completely offend you).