A Bowl of Stupid

The Indonesian Army on Saturday finally reached some of the areas worst hit by Wednesday’s earthquake, bringing two desperately needed tractors to unearth people and houses buried in landslides that swept away entire villages here. One of the tractors promptly broke down.

–New York Times, reporting on the extremely slow Indonesian response to the 7.6 magnitude earthquake that hit Sumatra last week (United Nations currently estimates the death toll at more than 1,000, with thousands more still missing).

So, it’s been a whole year since I moved to Bali. Looking back, I can still (barely) remember my reasoning for doing so:

At the time, I was basing myself out of Bangkok, but throughout the extensive (Northern Hemisphere) summer, I was only staying there 2-3 weeks every other month and spending most of my other time jockeying around the Indonesian archipelago, looking for surf.

It was costing my heaps of money in terms of running back and forth to Bangkok for visa runs, to pick up clothes, pay bills, and other random crap. Plus, at the time, there were no inexpensive direct flights from Bangkok to Bali (which Air Asia now has), and I was spending additional moneys heading through Kuala Lumpur, Jakarta, and elsewhere — most of the time heading to, or through, Bali for surf supplies before heading to another destination.

So, although I had never been a fan of Southern Bali (the over-commercialized center of the Indonesian tourist/surf scene), I decided to give it a go in the hopes the island would grow on me — I’d practice my Indonesian, be able to surf on a more regular basis, and save some much needed money.

One year later and, despite all I’ve learned in terms of Indonesian culture, the international surf scene, and my own surfing abilities … I am, quite possibly, less of a fan of Bali than I was before I moved here last year.

The main reason for that is (apparently) indicated in the Taylor Steele movie I referenced in my last post — now that I’ve been here and I’ve been able to get a feel for some areas still untouched by tourism, it puts into sharp contrast the tourist nightmare that exists everywhere else on the island. And the greed, crowds, and incongruous stress that has become indicative of life here.

It used to be a lovely island, a tropical paradise. But no longer. That era is long gone.

It’s getting far too tiring to live here. The positives no longer outweigh the negatives. And it’s time for me to go.

I usually don’t post movie trailers here at all, let alone ones featuring story lines mimicking my own personal tale so closely. However, ‘The Drifter’ is different.

Primarily because I’m a big fan of the film’s star, Rob Machado (one of the preeminent ‘soul surfers’ of my generation, and whom I’ve actually met several times a decade ago while I was living in San Diego, and again later here in Indonesia), and its director, Taylor Steele (one of the more prominent, and talented, directors of the modern surf film).

Again, the apparent crux of the film echoes my own journey so closely that it’s eerie (except for the fact that I’m not a professional surfer, not world famous, not sponsored by Hurley, and in no way, shape, or form nearly as talented as is Machado).

‘The Drifter’ has been shown around Bali for the past couple months in the pro and semi-pro surfing circles, and it is being released in earnest later this Fall, 2009. Steele is outstanding in his ability to weave into a typical surf movie the other, and the majority, of what actually takes place on a surf trip — 95% of which takes place OUTSIDE the water.

It’s a fantastic film. It’s a beautiful representation of the Indonesia that still exists in ever-dwindling portions of the country. And, most importantly, it’s a brilliant showcase for one of the best surfers in the world today. Take a look, and go see it when it opens in wide release.

As I mentioned in my last post, one of the reasons I’ve been kept fairly busy lately is because I’ve had friends visiting me here in Bali for the past few weeks. Included in those visits was one of my best friends from Miami and his parents. And while he already has a couple brothers, I know him well enough that he feels like a brother to me. We have different perspectives on life, and he’s always been good at getting me to see things from other perspectives.

His recent visit was nothing new.

By now, it’s no secret that I have what, on my better days would be considered a ‘distaste’ for southern Bali’s ever-increasing tourist industry. On my worse days, it would be better defined as ‘utter contempt’.

The biggest issue is that Bali has absolutely no infrastructure. It’s streets, plumbing, landfills, and power plants were never built to accommodate anything more than the villages that occupied the island 25-30 years ago. This means frequent power failures, sewage in the ocean, traffic jams, and an overall decrease in the quality of life.

Personally, I call Kuta, Bali (the main surf tourist center) ‘the ghetto’. I try to avoid even going down there unless I need surf supplies simply because, although it’s only about 5-8 km away from my home, it takes about 30-40 minutes to get there. And once there, you must deal with the constant assault by tour operators, massage ‘therapists’, and shop keepers — all vying for your money, one way or another.

It is, in a word, a mess.

As the years pass, this mess has expanded ever further beyond the borders of Kuta, Bali — and it now reaches through Legion, Seminyak, Canggu, and up through Ubud into the southern hills. And since there is no such thing as ‘city planning’ or ‘civil engineering’ in Indonesia — the result is one vast, unregulated, illogical mess of random shops, alleys, roads, and hotels.

As noted previously, this has always been a source of irritation for me, for a variety of reasons.

First and foremost is because, if you look closely, you can still see the remnants of Bali’s original beauty. There are still random temples and rice patties and roaming cows in the midst of new hotels and villas and shops and parking lots. This place really must have been an absolute paradise once upon a time — as recently as 20 years ago, from what I’ve been told.

The second reason is more pragmatic — there reaches a breaking point for unmitigated and unregulated expansion. Sure, you can build dozens of 2500 person hotels and villas up and down the beach, but if the roads can only accommodate 1000 people, then what’s the point? Ultimately, it just gets too frustrating to deal with.

But here’s where my mate comes back into play — even though he’s also lived in Asia for a while (and is used to this type of third world disorder), when I took him down to Kuta, he loved it. He loved the mess, the mayhem, the chaos.

Sure, it’s a mess now, but even though the concept of ‘logic’ is a rare commodity on Bali, it will eventually prevail — whether due to developers, politicians, or the tourist industry. They will build bigger streets, and power lines that actually work, and buildings that don’t collapse every 5 years.

Indeed, just yesterday — only one (1) day after my mate left — I noticed something:

They just completed a monstrously huge mall complex right on the beach in Legion. It sticks out like a sore thumb, simply because it’s well built, has underground parking, and would fit in at any major beach town in New South Wales, Queensland, or California. I also noticed another large shopping center being built where some older shops had just been demolished in Seminyak.

My friend was right. Sure, Southern Bali is a mess — but it’s got character. There is no other place I’ve been to — in Asia or elsewhere — that is quite like it. Yes, I complain now, and I mourn the loss of Bali’s innocent recent past. But I sense that will be nothing compared to what’s coming.

I’ve no doubt that, within only several more years, Bali will turn into every other tourist beach town in the West. And while the traffic may ease, and the electricity may work, and the fresh water may flow — something will be lost in the transition.

Because of that, I thank my friend for lending me his perspective. Probably for the first time since I moved here last October, I’m glad I’m living in Bali now. Just as I’m jealous of the blokes who rave about how pristine the island was back 20 years ago, I’m sure others will be jealous of my stories of Kuta 20 years from now, when I can tell them of the chaos — back when it wasn’t just another beach town.

I know, I’ve been slacking off with the blog lately. But between looking for work, and friends visiting me here on the island, and the surgery and various doctor visits, I haven’t had either the time or the inclination to write. Nor have I really done anything worth writing about lately — so, unless you freaks are just SO bored you want to read ‘ate, slept, walked on beach, changed bandage, slept, ate’, rest assured, you haven’t missed much.

But now that I’m back on my feet (and my surfboard), I’m starting to feel a bit more like myself. Which, in turn, means that I feel like bitching — in written form — again.

First off, in response to what I heard were less than satisfactory reviews to my posts concerning my trip to Hong Kong several months ago, I will say only this to anyone who felt that way: … how to put this politely? umm … fuck you?

I’ve never made any secrets about the fact that, in addition to documenting my travels over the past few years for both my own posterity and for my friends and family to keep track of my whereabouts, this blog is also an outlet for me to bitch and moan. When I do it about celebrities and politicians, I get all kinds of fan mail. But when I do it about friends and family, I get grief. But it’s just a freaking blog, people — let’s keep things in fucking perspective.

Let me say this again another way — I don’t know Fergie. She may be a lovely person for all I know. But that will never prevent me from comparing her to Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Simply because it’s out there.

Similarly, any one of you people reading who has ever been married, has ever had siblings, or has ever had parents (… wait for it) — you can all attest that you have, at some point or another, gotten irritated at them, wanted to yell at them, or simply wished to slap the living shit out of them. Yet, just because I may get irritated with my friends and family at any certain point in time does not take away from the fact that I love them.

And if you think you know what exactly I’m talking about in my posts, you’re wrong. You’ve got no fucking clue. You may think you do. Indeed, I TRY to get my readers to think a certain way, because it makes for a better read — often times in direct contradiction to my actual thought processes. But you’ve no idea what I’m actually thinking. Especially those of you who’ve never even met me in person.

So, if you want to read this dribble, so be it — feel free to. But you’re the one who clicked onto this website. You should know just what to expect by doing so.

Last week marked the [REDACTED] year anniversary of when I [REDACTED] and left the States to instead begin my inexorable journey down the long road back to the middle. To commemorate the occasion, I purchased an 8 foot Mini-Malibu longboard to replace the one I left in The Philippines last year.

I’ve got a fairly rounded out quiver of surfboards at this stage — appropriate for most types of surf I can get out here in Indo, and indeed, around the world.

True, I still need a nice longer gun for some of the bigger, hollower Indo waves. But the way I see it, I can still barely perform adequately on the boards I’ve got. So let’s not kid ourselves — sure, my skill level has increased dramatically from when I first left my job, and I’m still best riding a longboard, but I’m never going pro on ANY length board. EV-ER.

That being said, I took the new longboard out for a spin today and realized/remembered that I essentially just started surfing last year or so. Before then, I was riding longboards almost exclusively. And while there are a whole slew of skills associated with longboarding, it is in no way, shape or form the same as riding a regular surfboard.

I honestly thought I’d enjoy going back to the longboard again, but to be honest — I found it a bit boring now that I’ve experienced the thrills of riding big hollow tubes, and actually WORKING the wave the way you can only on a shorter board.

My biggest problem in the water is still my ongoing frustration with myself more than anyone else in the water. With all my time in the water, I feel like I should be a far better surfer at this stage in the game. But like I just said — I”ve essentially only just started surfing about 1-2 years ago. I hope I can bring some of that realization with me when I go back out on one of my shorter boards and do a snap off the lip, or get another amazing barrel ride — with that huge ‘whooshing’ sound of the wave closing in behind and atop me.

It’s all good, mate. Semua bagus, dan saya senang sekali.

After a month in Timur Leste (East Timur) and Nusa Tenggara, Indonesia, I’m back in Bali again. I’ll probably be here a month or so, but I’ve got friends visiting from the States, Australia, and Asia for the next couple months, so I may be traveling a bit too.

I’ll keep you guys up to speed, such as it is.

P.S. BTW, no more posts about surf spots — EVER!! And I’m making all prior posts private. I met a bunch of Euro’s who found out about my spots by reading this blog. Talk about shooting yerself in the foot, mate.

I’m in Dili, East Timor getting a new Indonesian tourist visa. After a 12 hour bus ride from Kupang to Dili, it looks like I’m gonna be here a few days. I waited at the Indo Embassy this morning for a couple hours, and now I need to wait another couple days before they issue the visa itself (which I’m told is fairly quick, all things considered).

There’s pretty much NOTHING here but UN and NGO personnel mucking up the place. But apparently, there’s some good diving spots in the area — which I plan on checking out if any places take me despite the fact I left my dive card back in Bali. We’ll see how it plays out.

Other than that, it really is kind of a bizzare little world here. It’s your typical 3d world shit-hole (excuse my Euro-centric judging), but the cost of everything is absolutely through the ROOF. Whereas I can get a pretty nice room in Bali (of all places) for about US$8 per nite, here in Dili, the cheapest I could find was for US$23 — and I’m sleeping in a converted shipping container (no joke — it’s actually kinda cool[ish]). It’s like being back in Hong Kong — only without the style, nightlife, and well … civilization.

On top of that, they’ve got the second biggest Jesus statute in the world here (let’s here it for the Portugese — the first biggest Jesus statue is in Brazil, ANOTHER former Portugese refugee camp).

It’s another one of those places with a really strange vibe going on — the locals still have a kinda ‘subservient mentality’ from the many years of Portuse and Indonesian abuses here, and from what I’ve heard, now the UN people have kinda continued with that tradition a bit.

It’s kinda sad to see almost everyone FROM here look away and down, instead of smiling and waving — or even trying to sell you stuff like they do everywhere else in Asia. It’s kinda sad.

I’m still getting my bearings, but I don’t think I’ll be here too long this time for it to make a deeper impression. I plan on heading back to Indo first thing after getting my visa on Wednesday — I don’t think I could afford to stay here much longer.

With an area of just over 5,600 square kilometers (just over 2,170 square miles), the island of Bali is fairly large — nearly 10 times as large as Manhattan. And three decades ago, the Balinese economy was largely agriculture-based.

But now, tourism is the largest single industry. And tourist season is in full swing.

So, in addition to the 3.1 million or so natives, the 1 million or so other domestic workers (from Java and other islands), there are about 2 gazillion tourists roaming the streets, clogging the roadways, and otherwise kooking up the surf. And while it’s good for the locals (they need the tourism money) and it’s nice to see the new faces (sorta), it’s also still getting just a bit much for me.

After one of my good friends broke her leg in 2 places this week when she got hit by some kook on a motorbike, and after I went surfing out at Uluwatu’s a couple days ago with about 100 (no joke) of my closest ‘friends and family’, I remembered my initial plan when first moving to Bali — I wanted to use this island ONLY as a supply point and a ‘stepping stone’ to those other spots in Indonesia I TRULY love.

So I’m going someplace a bit calmer for a while.

First, I’m heading to Dili (East Timur) for a visa run, then I’m going back to Pulau Rote — about 1200 square kilometers, with an estimated total population of 100,000.

The village where I’m going (pictured above), there’s no internet, no running water, and the electricity is turned on for about 6-8 hours per day. The tourist population is limited to other silly foreigners looking for surf and quiet. And there’s not much to do besides surfing, sleeping, and the occasional jalan-jalan to the next village.

Hold all my calls, I’m gonna be off the grid for a while.

Today epitomizes one of the many ways Asia is so different to the States.

Today — or rather, this evening — the electricity in the entire towns of Legion and Seminyak — two of the biggest tourist and/or expat locales here on Bali — lost electricity for most of the afternoon and evening. Indeed, it is now about 8:30 at night, I’m at at a coffee shop working off a generator, and the electricity is still not on back in my house.

Chances are, nobody in a position of power (no pun intended) has even been alerted yet to the fact the electricity is, in fact, not working. Granted, the electricity goes out here on a fairly regular basis, but only for 15-20 minutes at a time — most likely due to overloads in the power grid. But the last time something like this happened for an extended period of time (a power pole went down on my street), it took most of 1.5 days for anyone to even START working on repairing the problem (and another 2 days for the power to eventually return — by which time, I was already gone to Bangkok).

Yes, California is also now prone to ‘revolving power outages’. But the outpouring of righteous indignation and immediate demands for assistance I’ve witness there whenever THAT happens is absolutely ridiculous — even by California standards.

In contrast, here in Bali, nobody even seems to notice. Or care all that much … besides us Westerners. To wit, while the local family from whom I rent my villa took the outage as a call to make it an early evening, I simply had to get to a coffee shop and the internet, lest I be bored to death by the presence of candles and silence.

Sure, I like to play Asian, and I may raise my voice in defiance every once in a while, but as soon as the electricity goes down, my true colours come out. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to get back to my iced late and the latest episode of The Daily Show — who knows if I’ll have my HBO back on when I get back home.

So surf season here in Bali is lurching forward, one minor swell at a time. The winds have changed, the rains have stopped, the surf is picking up, and the entire island seems to be buzzing with a renewed energy.

Yet something else seems amiss.

Oh yeah, the start of surf season here in Bali also hearkens the onset of the annual Australian migration.

The rainy season here generally coincides with the Australian summer. So all of the Aussies are back home, drinking shitty beer, eating copious amounts of beef, feeling up livestock, and doing whatever the fuck else those people do on their own time.

But now that winter’s coming there, they’re coming here.

It’s not bad, really. It’s just a bit disconcerting to see so many of the same, nondescript, vapid, blond haired, blue eyed, Bintang shirt wearing surf-drones descending onto the island like swarms of locust.

I’ve not been here long enough to complain in paradise (altho I will … cuz that’s just what I do), but it really is a mixed blessing. It’s great to be rid of the rain and gloom and trash. And it’s awesome that we’re having consistently good surf again. And yes, it’s even really nice to have new blood in the mix again.

But Aussies? Do they all have to be Aussies?

Really? Sigh. Oh well, I suppose one’s gotta take the good with the bad.

Well then, we’d better amp up production of shitty beer, silly t-shirts, and ‘availible’ livestock — cuz they’re all gonna go fast!

P.S. This is the maid speaking.

I was off the grid traveling for a couple days. I’m back home in Bali now. The following was written in yet another airport departure lounge … this time in the Melbourne airport.

Well, I’m leaving Australia. After less than 2 weeks total.

I know, I know … I had initially planned on staying in Australia and/or New Zealand for at least a month, and possibly more. But a variety of factors took hold that have made returning to Asia much more appealing to me right now.

First, it was just really too expensive in Australia in comparison to Asia. I mean REALLY expensive. I think I spent more money in Oz in 10 days that I’ve spent in Asia in the past six (6) months … TOTAL. So there’s that.

Second, and more importantly, I may not be physically able to be ‘reintroduced into the world. ‘I’ve had so many ‘pseudo-anxiety attacks’ since I first got here that it’s not comical, even on a self-depricating one (which is saying something since I typically love making fun of myself as much as anyone). Honestly however, the sensory overload, even when I’ve been traveling by myself, has been simply overwhelming.

For example, my friends here (thanks to Nicole, Jenna and Thress for showing me such a great time in Melbourne) took me out, showed me around, and introduced me to some really great people.Yet after 10 days here, when I took the train for lunch in downtown Melbourne today (which isn’t nearly as pretentious as Sydney), I was still sufficiently freaked out by the whole experience. Now I know how it must feel for small-towners to visit New York for the first time.

Indeed, I felt much much better when I got back to the smaller, artsy beach area of St. Kilda, where I’ve been staying for the past couple of days. The trip downtown kinda reaffirmed my beleif in the concept of a collective consciousness — I just felt the stressful pace of all those people working and shopping and going to school in hustle of Melbourne’s downtown, which in turn stressed me out since I’m not on that same level.

I’m heading back to Bali for at least a week or two. We’ll see how the waves are, and then I’m heading onward again to see one of my best friends in Hong Kong for a bit. We’ll see how it unfolds.

I’m back in Bali for a week or so before heading down to Australia for a while. I don’t know just how long I’m gonna be there, but I’m thinking in the 4-6 week range (depending on fundage).

Ironically, I’m having a pretty nice time here in Bali right now. The surf (although small) has been fun, the beaches are relatively clean, and the rainy season seems to have stopped (for now at least). Moreover, the same group of friends I was traveling with through Borneo last month are here. Which has made this week even better.

Like I mentioned, I head to Australia on Sunday — Gold Coast, Byron Bay, Sydney … and working my way down to Melbourne.

Once again, if anyone has any suggestions as to where I should / need to go along the Eastern Seaboard, please either comment or drop me a line — I’m always up for hitting great restaurants, towns, and (most importantly) surf spots!

So I took a road trip for few days up north to Ubud, which is about 2 hours north of the Kuta/Denpasar area of Bali. Ubud has an increasingly renowned arts scene and is still very touristy, but it’s off-season so it wasn’t all that crowded (especially in comparison to the Kuta/Legion/Seminyak area where I live down south).

I really enjoyed the place. Despite the fact that it IS a well-known tourist destination, Ubud still has a great ‘vibe.’ Ubud also has the ‘Monkey Forest’, a small nature reserve that houses a temple and over 200 long-tailed macaque monkeys.

It’s obviously a very artsy place. But it also has a genuine spiritual feel — the people seem to be much more about living their Hindu faith than here in the south, where it feels like the faith has devolved into a Westernised characterture of itself.

It’s a bit slower. The people seem a bit more genuine. The smiles more forthcoming. The people — locals and expats alike — seem less influenced by the whole tourist trade than down here. They’re all just a bit … nicer! (a friend of mine says most of the expats living down south area look like someone just pissed on their face — unfortunately, he’s right).

Additionally, I took the cycle for a ride 2-3 hours further north and it all just felt a bit like India SHOULD have felt (if that makes any sense). Also, I finally got the first good back massage ever outside of Thailand.

So, all in all, it was very nice.

I just went for a few days to scope it out, but I’ll be heading back up again in the next week or so. I plan to be up there often over the next couple months (which are the rainy season here in Bali, and the surf isn’t all that great). Instead, I’ll do what I did last year this time, when I went to Sri Lanka and India — focus on my yoga practice (there are several really good yoga places in Ubud) while still going out for a surf every once in a while.

I’ve been told there are numerous OTHER places in the north of the island that are just as,if not more, laid back as the Ubud area. I’m looking forward to visiting them in the coming months. And I’m just really glad I decided to move to Bali — especially considering I’d effectively be a hostage right now had I stayed in Bangkok.

P.S. I’ve started taking pictures again and should have some from this Ubud trip up online in the next few days.