A Bowl of Stupid

Ever since I was in law school, every purported boxing fan who knew just enough to get by, but not quite enough to understand the intricacies of the sport have told me that Oscar ‘The Golden Boy’ De La Hoya was their fucking idol. Yeah, what-the-fuck-ever …

Admittedly, De La Hoya has had some skillz. He was well trained from an early age (coming from a longtime fighting family), which eventually translated into an Olympic gold medal and ten world titles in six different weight classes. No small feat.

But more telling than his record is the fact that, as a handsome, clean-cut corporate sweetheart, De La Hoya has generated more money than any other boxer in the history of the sport. And in the ‘incorruptible’ world of professional boxing, this too is no small feat.

Moreover, critics have knocked De La Hoya throughout his entire career for lacking aggression, and his pre-bout antics are quite often more entertaining that the bouts themselves — which often devolve into clinics on ‘lifestyle maintenance.’

While not stating anything overtly about his ‘interesting’ pro record (the Mayweather split-decision and the ABSURD Sturm middleweight WBO title decision among others), and also not discounting his recent victory against a contestant on television’s boxing reality show, ‘The Contender’, I’m baffled as to how De La Hoya STILL manages to be such a HUGE box office (and pay per view) draw.

Because of this oxymoronic nature of De La Hoya’s career, I was pleased — although not shocked — to read about the results of the much heralded December 6th bout between him and Filipino hero, Manny Pacquiao (the TRUE golden boy):

LAS VEGAS (AP) — Manny Pacquiao fought a lot bigger than he looked. Oscar De La Hoya simply looked old. Pacquiao dominated his bigger and more famous opponent from the opening bell Saturday night, giving De La Hoya a beating and closing his left eye before De La Hoya declined to come out of his corner after the eighth round.

De La Hoya’s left eye was closed shut as he sat on his stool after the eighth round and the ring doctor, referee and his cornermen discussed his condition.

The fight was so lopsided and De La Hoya looked so inept that it could spell the end for boxing’s richest and most marketable star.

It’s about fucking time.

Again, admittedly, De La Hoya’s retirement will probably do nothing to change the underlying nature of professional boxing. Nor will De La Hoya cease to get rich off of the de-evolution of the sport (he, together with fellow ex-boxers Bernard Hopkins and Shane Mosley, owns ‘Golden Boy Productions’ — one of the largest combat sport promotional firms in the world). But at least this chapter of his career is over.

Yeah, he may be rich … and I may just be hating … but I gotta tell ya’ — it’s good to know that De La Hoya got the shit beat out of him as he sets off on that long, slow road to the middle.

P.S. Also a good read about the hype vs. reality that professional boxing has become, go read this great piece by Kevin Iole on Yahoo! Sports: “Boxing hype finally reaching the 21st century.”