Jul 27 2008
Okay, Perhaps I Shouldn’t Rush To Judgment …
Wanting to take full advantage of being back in the big city before I head out once again into the wilderness, I've just returned from my second trip to the movie theatre in as many days — this time I saw the new Hellboy II - The Golden Army film.
Remember how I JUST got done talkin' smack about the new Batman/Dark Knight film — saying how it lacked character and originality?
Well, after seeing the new Hellboy flick, I take it all back (or at least some of it).
Hoeee-leeey crap, did that Hellboy movie suck balls — big, red, demonic, monster balls, to be precise. Man, I don't know what the mouth breathing knuckle-draggers who made THAT steaming pile of crap were thinking, but it sure wasn't about how to make a good movie.
Yeah, I know, I should've expected as much from a Hellboy sequal, but it was directed by Guillermo Del Toro and I thought the previews looked pretty good. Whatever …
Anyway, it sure did give me a new perspective on the new Batman film. Sure, being an 'okay' movie awash in a sea of garbage it's fairly akin to being the skinniest kid at fat camp — but I guess, at the end of the day, you're still getting laid more than the other tubbo's by comparason.
P.S. I liked Ranylt's comment to my prior post so much, I decided to take 10 minutes out of my extremely busy schedule and put my limited 'photoshopping' skills to work in making a Stuart Smalley Joker:
Sadly, it looks much too much like the real thing. And if anyone thinks they can do any better in 10 minutes, well, you can go suck it. Suck it long. And suck it hard.
I’m dead. You just killed me dead. The hasty PS-ing just adds to the comedy.
Yeah, I better qualify my last remark before I get into trouble. I liked TDK and think it’s one of the better comic book adaptations, but I also found it conventional and flawed (as an action movie in general), and I didn’t feel The Magic ™ the rest of the world seems to be feeling…
“Greatest movie in the world” comments make me want to peel my skin off.